the don't tell mama shows

the past two weeks have been two of the most special weeks of my life. this year has been loaded with experiences beyond my wildest dreams. the past two weeks with charlene moore have been, at the risk of understatment, pretty amazing.

the rehearsals were spirit filled. charlene's presence brought the best out in all of us. when david sang 'fools fall in love' in the first rehearsal, i cried like i was in church. we began recording our album the same week and just having her there as a sounding board, was profound.

the energy the night of the first show was crazy. people were lined up out the door of the venue and when we finally hit the stage, we were ready. martha wash, one of our favorite vocalists, was in the audience and it was kind of uncanny having here there while we paid tribute to her, izora and sylvester.

as we did the encore, a medley of dottie rambo's 'he looked beyond on my fault' and the sylvester/patti anthem 'you are my friend', the song took a turn. the kind of turn that happens in church. what happened afterwards was 20 minutes of improvisation and the night turned from a bawdy, bluesy gathering to a revivial. i will never forget the sound of the audience or the sight of elizabeth cunningham's arms uplifted as she rose from her seat. the goddess was with us.

the night following the show, i felt myself starting to get ill. something wasn't right in my throat. it wasn't sore, but it was irritated. i started my regiment of tea, but it wasn't touching the achiness that was beginning to take over my body. by sunday night, i had a temperature. i was up most of the night sweating and monday, all i could do was sleep. the temperature rose and fell most of monday. it hit 102 and i called the doctor. his assistant said to go to the er if my fever hit anything over 100 before morning came. i got up around 5 and my brother took my temperature and hit had hit 103. we rushed to the er only to wait for two hours for nothing to happen.

i opted to leave and thankfully my doctor got me in. i started antibiotics and worried about whether or not i would be able to do friday's show. then one of my soulkiss brothers got a cold. we both medicated and kept positive and sure enough, by friday, we were passable.

something happened when we hit the stage on the 30th. we found that 'thing' that true lovers of song have. i've experienced moments when i couldn't whisper, and when i hit the stage, the voice came from nowhere and this past friday was one of those experiences. we made it through the show without a single cough or voice break. charlene was brilliant, once again, and the spirit rose. i saw one of our dear friends reduced to tears and the mere sound of her voice.

when i reviewed the footage for youtube, the majority of the clips i chose came from that second night. something otherworldly happens when you are forced to find that place inside and spirit has to simply rise to make it all work. and that's what this past friday's show was.

on sunday, charlene's birthday arrived and she wanted to go to church, so we packed up in the car and went with her. as the service was reaching an end, i felt the presence of spirit. i began to cry...i never can deny it. i find as i get older, my ability to be reserved evades me more and more. i remember my head dropping in surrender and the tears flowed. i felt one brothers hand on my back. i felt my other brother take my hand. with my eyes closed, we met in that other place. that place that is, as elizabeth has written about, between the worlds. while we were physically in this place together, we were spiritually together in another place. it was sacred. it was holy. and i will never forget it.

people see the videos and come to the shows and imagine that we are in a certain place. but i can be transparent enough to say that we are yet in that pending place. we are on our way. things are happening, but there are still day to day worries...day to day needs...day to day questions...and momentary forgetfullness of what we know lies ahead. but we are given these moments to remember..and remember...and remember again.

be sure to check all of the clips at www.youtube.com/timdillinger